R.A.C.K. is a common term used to describe TTWD (this thing we do) but do people really know what it means? It stands for Risk Aware Consentual Kink.
Do you know the risks that go along with things like breath play or water sports? Do you engage in said activities?
With every activity one engages, there is an element of risk, and BDSM is no different. When one gives their consent to activities in an alternative lifestyle such as this one, they imply they understand the risk. Your consent is given until you take it away by using a safe word or ending the relationship.
By accepting the terms and the risks, a Dom and sub are both accepting responsibility for the risks and the possible outcomes. To engage in any activity in TTWD, you must be fully aware of any possible risk. With normal, vanilla sex, the risk is that of pregnancy and STD transmission, and those risks are there with kink, but there are also more risks. There is the risk of perminant damage to your body, taking breath play too far, or countless other risks.
If the risks are so great, why would anyone engage in BDSM? If you are with a partner you can trust and you trust yourself, there will be no problems.
Problems arise when the consent is withdrawn or the safe word used and the activity does not stop. They arise when a submissive does not know their own limits or does not want to admit the limits for fear of dissapointing the Dominant or ridicule within the community.
When one is aware of the risk, the main word in that phrase is consentual. This is a word you will hear over and over again when exploring anythign to do with the lifestyle. The consent is what makes TTWD different from abuse or rape. There is a fine line between TTWD and abuse, the line of consent.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
That was then....
It all started when I saw this beautiful creature instructing a dance class full of women older then she was. She was serious and dedicated to the art. I saw her after class one day, changing into toe shoes. I sat there, enthralled by her movements. She was mesmerizing. I knew I had to get to know her more, but I didn't know why. I felt some sort of primal pull towards her. I had never been attracted to a woman before, and certianly not this little sprite of a girl, but, alas, I was. Before anyone gets any ideas, she was barely 15 and I was barely 18. She moved with the confidence and grace of a seasoned professional with the NYC Ballet, but she was so young.
She noticed me then, watching her private rehersal. She didn't know I was watching her. After a little fumbling on both of our parts, I asked her if I could take her out for a bite to eat to "make up for" interrupting her rehersal. Over dinner, she explained that she was teaching the class I was in in trade for some rehersal time in the studio. I was fascinated by this small, elegant creature who was sitting across from me. When it was time to part, we made plans for after the next class and I went home and masturbated furiously (I was so turned on by this girl, I couldn't help myself, and I have never admited that anywhere before, not even to her, lol).
Things went on like that for a little while, we became close, and we both realized what was there. We started sleeping togetehr very quickly.
Then, one night, we got a little rough, and we both LOVED it. She naturally took on the submissive role and I took the Dominant one. I did some casual looking into the lifestyle when I realized what we were doing. I realized my little one had a thing for pain. We explored many different kinds of fetishes and kink, and found something that worked for us.
She broke right here, on the bed I am sitting on right now to write this. I will never forget the look of love, devotion, and surrender on her face when she whispered "Mistress" for teh first time. I went from being a no nonsense Domme to being a gentle one in that instant. I loved her, and still do to this day.
She was a wonderful little one. It came naturally to her. It did not matter to her if we were sitting around watching TV and she was curled up beside me, if she was kneeling at my feet while I was on the phone, or if we were out and she was on a leash at a friend's home. We were in love and I had a very well behaved, although occasionally impish, little one. Not bad for my first little one, lol.
Like many good things, though, we eventually began to argue, a lot. Mostly about her dance career and that neither of us had come out to our families about our sexuality, let alone our kinks. To this day, we are both still "in the toy box" about the kinks we enjoy. When we eventually broke up, I was devastated. To be honest, I went out and tried to find someone who was as good with me as she was, but couldn't find that magic.
Fast foward a few years, I find out my little one, whom I still had not gotten over, despite everythign going on in my life at the time, had gotten married. I was hurt and I think I spent several hours in the gym the night I found out. I tried to get her back several times, but she was not going to leave her husband for me. I finally decided within myself that if I truly did love her the way I said I did and the way I knew I did, then I would want her to be happy.
Now, she has been married for a few years, and I decided that having her in my life as a friend is better then not having her at all. And, I knew the way to have her in my life at all was by making friends with her husband. Well, the first time we spoke, He and I hit it off very well. We were both attracted to one another, which surprised me because I had given up on men, lol. In fact, we cybered that first night, lol. I knew He was my little one's Dominant, and that He would never be a submissive, and I didn't want Him to be. But I wanted tot ry out the submissive role. Under His guidence and protection, I was able to try it out and realize what I really am. I am a woman who is submissive to men yet Dominant to women.
He collared me one evening using the same one I had given my little one. I broke and first said the word Master on that same bed my little one had done so all those years ago. I think He is the Master I have been waiting for and I couldn't be much happier. He is the Master of me, the Owner of my spirit, body, mind, soul, heart, and passion. What I am is His.
She noticed me then, watching her private rehersal. She didn't know I was watching her. After a little fumbling on both of our parts, I asked her if I could take her out for a bite to eat to "make up for" interrupting her rehersal. Over dinner, she explained that she was teaching the class I was in in trade for some rehersal time in the studio. I was fascinated by this small, elegant creature who was sitting across from me. When it was time to part, we made plans for after the next class and I went home and masturbated furiously (I was so turned on by this girl, I couldn't help myself, and I have never admited that anywhere before, not even to her, lol).
Things went on like that for a little while, we became close, and we both realized what was there. We started sleeping togetehr very quickly.
Then, one night, we got a little rough, and we both LOVED it. She naturally took on the submissive role and I took the Dominant one. I did some casual looking into the lifestyle when I realized what we were doing. I realized my little one had a thing for pain. We explored many different kinds of fetishes and kink, and found something that worked for us.
She broke right here, on the bed I am sitting on right now to write this. I will never forget the look of love, devotion, and surrender on her face when she whispered "Mistress" for teh first time. I went from being a no nonsense Domme to being a gentle one in that instant. I loved her, and still do to this day.
She was a wonderful little one. It came naturally to her. It did not matter to her if we were sitting around watching TV and she was curled up beside me, if she was kneeling at my feet while I was on the phone, or if we were out and she was on a leash at a friend's home. We were in love and I had a very well behaved, although occasionally impish, little one. Not bad for my first little one, lol.
Like many good things, though, we eventually began to argue, a lot. Mostly about her dance career and that neither of us had come out to our families about our sexuality, let alone our kinks. To this day, we are both still "in the toy box" about the kinks we enjoy. When we eventually broke up, I was devastated. To be honest, I went out and tried to find someone who was as good with me as she was, but couldn't find that magic.
Fast foward a few years, I find out my little one, whom I still had not gotten over, despite everythign going on in my life at the time, had gotten married. I was hurt and I think I spent several hours in the gym the night I found out. I tried to get her back several times, but she was not going to leave her husband for me. I finally decided within myself that if I truly did love her the way I said I did and the way I knew I did, then I would want her to be happy.
Now, she has been married for a few years, and I decided that having her in my life as a friend is better then not having her at all. And, I knew the way to have her in my life at all was by making friends with her husband. Well, the first time we spoke, He and I hit it off very well. We were both attracted to one another, which surprised me because I had given up on men, lol. In fact, we cybered that first night, lol. I knew He was my little one's Dominant, and that He would never be a submissive, and I didn't want Him to be. But I wanted tot ry out the submissive role. Under His guidence and protection, I was able to try it out and realize what I really am. I am a woman who is submissive to men yet Dominant to women.
He collared me one evening using the same one I had given my little one. I broke and first said the word Master on that same bed my little one had done so all those years ago. I think He is the Master I have been waiting for and I couldn't be much happier. He is the Master of me, the Owner of my spirit, body, mind, soul, heart, and passion. What I am is His.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
An introduction
My name is Tiger_Eyes, and I am a proud collared submissive. I am very happy being owned by my Master, OwnerOfBeauties. There are people out there who consider a submissive woman as a doormat, but we are much much more. I am new tot his side of the collar, as in the past, I have been the Dominant one. Now, I am happy in my submission to Him, and it has been given freely and of my own free will. A very wise submissive, who just so happened to be mine at the time, and who now belongs to my Master as well, once told me that only through submission to another can her inner self be completely free. I can understand what she means by that now.
For the moment, Master, my subbie sister, and I are in a semi long distance relationship. He is married to BrightEyes (my former submissive, His now) and I am long distance. We are all very happy with this set up right now, and it does not make my submission to Him or His ownership of me any less complete.
I hope to use this journal as a place to express myself in my submission, a place to explore the feelings within myself, and a place to grow and learn more about this side of the collar. I will write about things I feel, or "topics" I may come up with, some of which I have asked BrightEyes to write about in the past or presently, as well as any topics Master may wish I explore further by writing about them or topics He may wish to hear my opinion on. He may also use this journal as a place He can ask me to write my thoughts about a missdeed. Anything I say within this journal, though, holds no repricussions within the bedroom or lifestyle aspect of our relationship.
I live my life by two sayings when it comes to anything lifestyle related. R.A.C.K. (Risk Aware Consentual Kink) and Safe, Sane and Consentual Play. I hope that this journal will help me to learn and grow within my role in our relationship.
For the moment, Master, my subbie sister, and I are in a semi long distance relationship. He is married to BrightEyes (my former submissive, His now) and I am long distance. We are all very happy with this set up right now, and it does not make my submission to Him or His ownership of me any less complete.
I hope to use this journal as a place to express myself in my submission, a place to explore the feelings within myself, and a place to grow and learn more about this side of the collar. I will write about things I feel, or "topics" I may come up with, some of which I have asked BrightEyes to write about in the past or presently, as well as any topics Master may wish I explore further by writing about them or topics He may wish to hear my opinion on. He may also use this journal as a place He can ask me to write my thoughts about a missdeed. Anything I say within this journal, though, holds no repricussions within the bedroom or lifestyle aspect of our relationship.
I live my life by two sayings when it comes to anything lifestyle related. R.A.C.K. (Risk Aware Consentual Kink) and Safe, Sane and Consentual Play. I hope that this journal will help me to learn and grow within my role in our relationship.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
